I rarely ask for advice on costumes. I’m pretty good at figuring it out myself. Still, I heard “you should go as Ugly Betty!” from 5 or 6 different people. I don’t get why. My hair is not long and unruly. My eyebrows are pretty normal. I don’t wear braces or glasses. I usually match and avoid clashing patterns. All that really doesn’t matter. I didn’t want to dress up as Betty — even though she’s my favorite Chicana on network TV and is a pocha just like me — because she’s just too popular. If you can buy a kit for your costume, chances are you’ll show up at a party and find your twin. One costume site I found was sold out of the Betty kit. That’s too much for me. I don’t want competition.

I’m not going to write up Betty like I’ve done with other costumes. A simple Google search will yield some pretty good how-tos or you could just watch the show (here and here).

To avoid looking like every other Betty, I’d recommend making it a group costume featuring one of Betty’s two love triangles.

Betty, Walter and Henry:

• Betty: see links above or watch the show
• Walter: jeans, button-down shirt and a blue big-box store vest
• Henry: geeky glasses, sweater vest and slacks

Betty, Walter and Henry – Halloween version:

• Betty: purple butterfly costume plus standard Betty hair, eyebrows and accessories (see The Lying, the Watch, and the Wardrobe)
• Walter: net for catching butterflies, safari hat, fishing vest, khaki shorts and matching shirt
• Henry: Superman t-shirt under conservative grey suit

Betty, Henry and Gio:

• Betty: see links above or watch the show
• Henry: geeky glasses, sweater vest and slacks
• Gio: red apron and bright colored flyers with “Gio’s Sandwiches” and a pickle with a smiley face (see: Something Wicked this Way Comes)

If you’re in a true love triangle, the group costume could be awkward. It might be better to just get some guy friends together. Or drink lots of alcohol (responsibly, of course).

Growing up my family never celebrated Día de los Muertos. Late October and early November were spent preparing and celebrating Halloween, my tía Martha’s birthday, All Saints Day and All Souls Day. I didn’t learn about the wonderful traditions associated with Día de los Muertos until I got to college. I was hooked by the imagery and art, especially any take on José Guadalupe Posada’s 1913 zinc etching of la Catrina.

I realize la Catrina may not be a low-budget or low-effort costume, unless you have turn of the century clothing and hats lying around. However, dressing up as la Catrina will set you apart from all the other women dressed like sexy [insert random profession here]. As la Catrina, you won’t be showing any skin. You also won’t be just any other lazy Chicana who simply painted her face like a calaca as your costume shows much more effort. Finally, you can easily go from your average Halloween party to a Día de los Muertos event in the same costume.

Here’s how to do la Catrina:

• Black and white face paint (I shouldn’t have to tell you what to do with it)
• Fancy women’s clothing circa 1910 OR
• Fitted maxi skirt and fitted long-sleeved blouse with a high collar (or a dress)
• White gloves
• Ankle boots (they’re in style these days!)
• Wide-brimmed straw hat decorated with many fake flowers
• Optional accessories: faux fur, feather boa, expensive looking earrings
• Works best if: you’re tall and thin

If you can pull it together, send me pictures!

Upper left photo (purple hat) by Pepergrass, used under Creative Commons License.

A few years ago, my ex dressed up as a Killa Bee* (of Wu Tang fame). He bought a bumblebee costume online (above right) and found a Wu Tang medallion. Some people thought he looked more like Bumblebee Man from The Simpsons rather than a Killa Bee.

As faithful Simpsons fans may know, the Bumblebee Man is a parody of el Chapulín Colorado and appears on Channel Ocho in Springfield.

Here’s how to do it:

• Grey or black hoodie
• Yellow t-shirt with wide black stripes for the bee body (if you don’t mind spending some money, you can easily find a baggy bumble bee costume like the one above)
• Antennae (DIY with a black headband, pipe cleaners and yellow pom poms; or you could just buy some for a few dollars at a costume shop)
• Blue/grayish wings (DIY with wire hanger and panty hose or foam)
• Khaki or brown shorts
• Black Converse Chuck Taylors or other black canvas sneakers
• Pansa (beer gut) and brown skin
• Chihuahua doll
• Walk around saying nonsensical and grammatically incorrect Spanish phrases, such as “¡Ay, ay, ay, no me gusta!”, “¡Ay, ay, ay, no es bueno!” and “¡Ay, Dios no me ama!”

If you’d rather be a Killa Bee, you’ll need a Wu Tang medallion or pendant (try eBay).

*That’s the year I dressed up as a sunflower.