The fax


Right after I confirmed my relationship to Sean, I texted my sister. “If you see something about me being engaged on FB, it’s a joke. Sorta.”

I’d explain later. The full story wouldn’t fit in a text message.

Before I’d even left the office I had a text from Vane, “you’re engaged?! Did I miss something?”

On Facebook, Taz was the first of many to respond with incredulous felicitations. “You got engaged? Congratulations!!!”

Some simply offered joyful congratulations, but those who knew me were right to wonder what was going on (probably because I never mentioned breaking up with Alan on the blog or FB). Some called bullshit. And some, like César, put it nicer, “Is this for real or just for jokes?” Alfonso/HP wondered if it was a really early April Fool’s Day prank.

“What’s the official story?” I asked Sean via text.

“Maybe. Or no comment.”

Curiously, Sean wasn’t dealing with any of this. The same news elicited no response from his FB contacts.


Question: Did you get engaged for real for real?

Answer: It’s not for real until he talks to my parents, right? But there was a question. And I did say yes. Now, what I said yes to is probably something a lot less serious than a lifelong commitment.

I procrastinate on everything. Lent was no different. It was Ash Wednesday and I still had not settled on my sacrifice. Would it be sweets? Alcohol? Shopping? Men in LA?

I discussed this with Sean after returning to the office with ashes on my forehead. He suggested sweets and sent me a silly e-card. I laughed and then got curious.

“Have you ever been accused of being flaky?”

“Never in my entire life. If it was possible to be overly reliable…”

“Even by friends? Family? Or is this just relationships?”

“Friendships and relationships.”

“Wow. Where do I sign up to marry you?”

“Ha. I’ll fax over the contracts”

I gave him my work fax number. A few moments later, he returned and told me my fax line was busy.

“Is that a metaphor?”

“No, a fact.”

“Damn. Can you scan and send as pdf?”

I was curious to see these contracts. I didn’t wait long as I saw a new message in my inbox from him with the subject line “fax.” There was no message, just an attachment, “cindy.pdf.” I downloaded the document and opened it.


I closed the window immediately, worried my co-worker would see. I checked in with Sean again.

“So, no signature required?”

“Well, until I can get a contract in writing, this would be a preliminary agreement.”

I asked once again about the fine print and my commitment, but Sean brushed it off saying he only had 10 minutes to draw it up.

I waited until I got home to place a fat red check mark over the yes box. I sent it back.

He was happy with my answer.


The next day, as we talked about rings he mentioned making it public on Facebook.

“Do it.”

“You think I’m joking.”

“I know you’re not.”


11 thoughts on “The fax

  1. R. says:

    I never bought into the engagement deal and I think I might’ve mentioned something somewhere on the twitters/fb/or here. Now that does mean I know you really well? or just well enough?

    That said, very recently, someone who shall remain nameless *cough*k*cough* told me she was getting married and I just But it was true.

  2. Diana says:

    I missed this, since I’m not on facebook, but I heard about it in New York, with Jenny and Vane. I still think I need some catching up…

  3. I agree with AMG. I don’t get it. I thought love found its own way. I felt it was so in my day (I’m 62 and have a married daughter of 30). You are a marvel! I’ve read your stuff and seen your photos! What’s the mystery or conflict here??? If I were single and 28-29. I’d propose in a minute (Well, actually, not so fast – I’ve have to check with my mom).
    So what’s up? Are you going to continue being my secular “Sor Juana Inez de la Cruz” or are wedding bells in the future? (Come on, I can’t believe your Dad would let you get away with this “wishy-washy-ness”. I’ve seen his photo. He’s Cesar Chavez! “Si se puede” (What do I mean by that?). You are a UCLA grad. Let commit and come out. What is it. Engaged or not.

  4. tank mcspankie says:

    i missed the FB part when it happened, but i noticed it on sean’s page just now. frankly, i’ve had my suspicions about you two for some time now. i only even looked at sean’s page right now b/c i saw the beck song he posted on twitter which made me even more suspicious and since i’ll do ANYTHING to stop me writing this bloody boring essay, i decided to investigate…

    if this works out, i’ll be a very happy bunny. 🙂

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