Familia, Fotos

Mil palabras: La familia, 1958

Ureño Saldivar kids, 1958
Ureño Saldivar kids, 1958

Top (left to right): Chilo, Socorro, Roberto
Bottom: Eva, Chuy, Luz (my mom!)
Not yet born: Martha and Josefina

At the anniversary party two weeks ago, we displayed a three-panel poster board with photos of the family. The center panel had photos of Papá Chepe and Mamá Toni from their 15th, 25th, 50th and a few other notable anniversaries. The photo above is from the 15th anniversary. My mom was the baby of the family at that time. She was one year old.

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Preguntas

Question of the week: OCD tendencies

I can’t go to sleep if the closet door is open. And I have to make sure the toilet paper is inserted the right way. Yes, there is correct way. Oh, and if I one hand or foot gets wet, I have to wet the other hand or foot. If I don’t, I get really uncomfortable, almost to the point of feeling pain.

These are my OCD (obsessive compulsive) tendencies. I think there are more, but I don’t want to seem too weird.

La Pregunta: What are your OCD tendencies?

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Cuentos

Un sueño

La casa azul

I dreamt about you last night.

It was the first time I’d seen you in a while, much longer than I’m accustomed to. You didn’t look different. You had the same eyes and smile.

But they weren’t the same, your smile and eyes and face lit up with happiness. You were, like, glowing. It was strange. I’ve never seen you that happy.

You’d won the lottery. $16 million. You spun a colorful wheel on the Big Spin and it landed on this obscene figure.

Sixteen million.

I don’t know how I learned about your good luck. Did a mutual friend send me a YouTube clip? Did I actually watch you win on televsion? Was there a mass email? It was probably just chisme.

I was happy for you. I wanted to call, but I didn’t. I just don’t call. I’m passive aggressive like that.

Time passed on in the dream. I didn’t see you or speak to you. How un-dream like.

Soon I learned that you were moving and leaving your current job. You’d be taking your winnings and moving abroad to do the do-gooder work we talked about in our less cynical days.

And I was sad, because now we’d really be far away from each other.

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Política

Poetry and politics

I don’t remember the exact words from Julia Alvarez’s In the Name of Salomé, but I do remember the sentiment:

A poet puts into words what can’t be put into words.

Kris articulated exactly how I felt today, how I felt in 2000 (even voting Green!) and 2004. He’s a poet.

America felt especially beautiful this morning.
New York City feels especially beautiful today.
I can’t quite wrap my head around how beautiful the whole world might look tomorrow morning.

I voted today. I’ve never voted in a primary before. I’ve been registered as Independent since Nader–and no, I didn’t cost Gore the presidency, Mom. When I moved back to New York, I re-joined the Democratic party. I did it so I could vote for Obama.

So okay, it’s not a shock that I’d be voting for this guy. I’m a member of the hip-hop generation. There’s a cool ass Black dude–a Progressive cool ass Black dude–running for President? Of course he gets my vote. He’s from Chicago, he plays basketball, he owns up to his youthful indiscretions? Sign me up. And he can speak? He can speak with rhythm, with flavorful cadences, with enthusiasm and passion and accessibility? He can speak to me, directly to me, the way so many hip-hop artists and theater artists and neighborhood geniuses have spoken to me, full of confidence without bluster, swagger with compassion, spirit and spirituality and yeah, I say this without irony, love in his voice and his heart? And he’s young, he’s handsome, he’s–I can’t believe I’m saying this–electable? I’m voting. I voted. I ride for Barack.

AND he sounds like The Rock? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeit (c) Clay Davis.

My vote isn’t surprising.

But my dad reminded me to vote today. He voted early. I think he voted for Barack. But even that’s not surprising, really–my dad likes cool ass Black dudes as much as I do. He has a bust of Marx on his bookshelves. He’s also a real estate agent now (hmm–think about that one). He’s a Democrat, pretty through and through. And he digs Obama. Not a shock.

My mom–look, my mom is a woman. My mom is a Baby Boomer woman who rode for The Clintons like I ride for Barack. My mom has been ready to vote for Hillary since that first post-Lewinski press conference, I bit. She’s the kind of relatively conservative Democrat that the Clintons want to have dinner with up in Chappaqua. She’s the kind of voter that Hillary’s folks are counting as givens. And yeah, she’ll probably vote for Hillary. But as I write this, she’s undecided. She’s that taken in by this guy.

It’s beautiful.

I’ve voted in two other presidential elections in my lifetime. Nader had me (and many of my peers) fired up because he represented something different. He was a voice for the issues we felt were important. We knew he wouldn’t win. We didn’t care about him winning. We went Green and independent because we were independent, because we needed to be heard somehow, and he was the way to get heard. And we lost, and our second choice lost, and it was disheartening, yes, but it felt like we were speaking loud and clear, and lo and behold–our second choice is now the greenest motherfucker in politics. And film, for that matter. As Fergie and Daddy Yankee would say: “Impacto.”

In 2004, we mobilized and we mobilized strong. We rode hard for Kerry, not because any of us really dug Kerry, but because–well, you know. And we lost. I remember being at Southpaw on election night, watching Baba Israel and J-Love and company bring hip-hop and funk and US to the presidential election. We went to bed that night thinking we had changed the way things were done. We woke up to find out the efforts had fallen short. The students I had been working with on the campaign said things like: “Why should I even register when I turn eighteen? We did all this work, and it didn’t make a difference.” I knew where they were coming from. I couldn’t teach that day. I cried tears of frustration in the office when no one was looking. The tears were about losing so much as anger at the process–we poured this much work into getting behind a guy that NO ONE really wanted to see as President. And we still almost made it happen. Imagine if it was Edwards. Imagine if it was a cool ass smart ass Black dude. Things would have changed.

But of course, things do change, and impacts are made, and now, today, it’s soggy and nasty in New York, but The Giants are parading in the Canyon of Heroes, and there’s an energy here, yo.

Brooklyn College (the most ethnically diverse institution I know of in NYC) is buzzing. For a primary.
Emerson Middle School, where I voted, was buzzing. For a primary.

There’s a guy we care about, and he’s running against a woman who, all things being equal, would be a President I could stand behind. Hell, there’s a crazy old Republican with a crazy way old mother who I could stand behind (The old guy, not the mom. No wait–the mom too). There’s an internet rock star independent thinker sticking around, stirring things up. And yeah, there’s a business as usual Mormon robo-politican around, and a religious conservative dude–but hey, no Rudy.

And there’s Barack Hussein Effing Obama, who has put tears in the back of my eyes, who has me believing in Bob The Builder slogans (Yes We Can!) as a sign of potential social change.

I’m not convinced he’s going to win.
Hell, I’m not convinced he’ll get nominated.
And I’m sure that if he does win, he’ll never–NEVER–live up to everything that my generation is expecting of him.
He might not be the best President ever.

And you know what? It wouldn’t matter.

Because right now, a whole lot of people fucking care for once.
And we care because this dude is here.

Neither my state nor Kris’ state has gone for Obama, but there’s still hope.

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Política

Rockstars have videos

I remember the feeling I had on January 3rd. I had just left the Murakami exhibit at MOCA and was on my way back to my apartment. The first thing I did when I got to my car was turning on the radio to hear the news from the Iowa caucuses.

NPR was reporting the news that Obama had won. I yelled in my car. It was the first time that I yelled out in happiness. I usually scream in frustration and anger. But no, this yell was happy. And I found myself choked up and crying a little.

It was strange. I didn’t even know I liked Obama that much.

I got that same sense watching this video Friday night. It was right after I’d read the news about La Opinión endorsing Obama. It gave me chills.

I hope Super Tuesday is like the Super Bowl and goes to the underdog.

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