Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking.

“I could have swore you wrote this,” Sean said in an IM (even though he’s in Westwood Village and I’m on campus).

“I didn’t,” but I’ve written something very similar (the advantages of blogging for nearly 10 years). I fished around the archives of my current and old blog and found the post. It’s still relevant.

Oh yes. Sean passes the test. Of course he does.

yeah, yeah, i love the sandlot [04.18.05]

Last fall I accompanied my best guy friend, Eligio, to the movies. I can’t remember what we watched, but for some reason I think it was related to sports. Anyway, I mentioned that I loved baseball movies and The Sandlot was my favorite. And then Eligio dropped a bomb on me. He confessed that he had never seen the film.

I said something along the lines of, “You’re killing me, Eligio! What?! We’ve been friends how long? How come I never knew this about you?!”

From that point on, our friendship has been different and even a little strained.

It might have not surprised me if Eligio was not as much of a baseball fan as me. We have a lot in common and I just assumed that he always caught on to the frequent references I make to The Sandlot in everyday dialogue. But he hadn’t.

When the film was released in 1993, I immediately loved it. Rather, I loved Benny “the Jet” Rodriguez (Mike Vitar). Yeah-yeah, I was swooning every single time Benny’s beautiful face and intense green eyes filled the screen.

It didn’t hurt that the film was focused on one of my favorite subjects, baseball, that there was plenty of witty dialogue, and that Benny was the star of the film.

If you ask me what my all-time favorite film is, I will always respond with The Sandlot. There are other films I enjoy that are more profound, artistic, and (let’s face it) mature. However, these are films I’ve liked for a much shorter time.

I’ve watched The Sandlot dozens of times in the last twelve years and still have not outgrown the humor and silly gags. If you watch it with me, you might even get annoyed because I have the habit of quoting nearly every line.

I currently do a Sandlot test of most people I meet. I quote a few lines and see if he/she catch the reference. If he/she doesn’t, I know we’re not soulmates nor is he/she a potential best friend. Yeah yeah, it is that serious.

A few of my favorite lines [The Sandlot script]:

  • Benny: Anyone who wants to be a can’t-hack-it pantywaist who wears their mama’s bra, raise your hand.
  • Benny: Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking.
  • Benny: I bet you get straight A’s and shit.
    Smalls: No, I got a B once, but it should have been an A…
  • Squints: If you’da been thinkin you wouldn’t ‘a thought that.
  • Squints: It’s about time Benny, my clothes are goin’ outta style.
  • The Babe: Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. Follow your heart, kid, and you’ll never go wrong.
  • Ham: Hey, Smalls, you wanna s’more?
    Smalls: I haven’t had anything.
    Ham: No, do you wanna s’more?
    Smalls: How can I have some more of nothing?
    Ham: You’re killing me Smalls!
  • Ham: This pop isn’t workin’, Benny! I’m bakin’ like a toasted cheeser! It’s so hot here!
  • Smalls (adult): Even my own mom, a grown-up girl, knew who Babe Ruth was.
  • Ham: You play ball like a girl!
  • Squints: Come on, Benny. Man. The kid is a L, 7, WEENIE!
    Yeah Yeah: Yeah-yeah, a real square
    Squints: Oscar Meyer even, foot-long, a Dodger Dog!
  • Mr. Mertle: Baseball was life! And I was good at it… real good.
  • Squints: forever!
  • Mom: You’ll always be just an egghead with an attitude like that.

Photo credit: Sean


3 thoughts on “Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking.

  1. These are sayings we use all the time around here: the can’t hack it panytwaist, the L7 weenie, forrreeeeverrrrrrr, you’re killing me smalls, baking like a toasted cheeser, and oiling and lotion and of course YOU PLAY BALL LIKE A GIRL. My boys love to say, I’ve swam here my whole adult life.

    Hehehe good times. One of my all-time fave movies. It never gets old!

  2. frank says:

    “Thanks” to HBO repeating the same movies over and over and over I’ve seen the “Sandlot” and “Rudy” many times.

    Favorite scene – Squirts and Wendy the lifeguard at the pool. The song “This Magic Moment” in the background was genius.

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