Boda, Familia

100 days and 300+ guests

When Sean and I checked in at the engaged couples retreat last month, the volunteers told us about the optional scavenger hunt in our notebooks. The scavenger hunt — more like people bingo — was a 3×4 grid with descriptions in each square. These included “went to the movies in the past week”, “is having a live band at their wedding,” and “is having a large wedding (more than 200 guests).” If you chose to participate, you could ask another couple to fill in a square. It was a nice ice breaker.

Although we could fill out most of the squares, Sean and I filled out the big wedding option when it was open. While two hundred guests is well over the average guest list — 152 according to the 2011 American Wedding Study — it’s not much more than my family only list. I could have a bigger wedding than average just including my family (with no small children).

Of course, numbers came up. One of us would sheepishly mumble 300, less than the actual total. The other couple would look scared for us and then explain that they were ruthless with cutting the guest list. I felt judged in a way, as if they thought we were going crazy inviting anyone and everyone we had met since kindergarten and friends of our parents we’d never met. It’s not the first time I felt like I needed to explain myself. I’ve heard similar reaction from wedding vendors.

All I need are three simple words: Mexican Catholic family.

More specifically, a close-knit Mexican Catholic family concentrated primarily in Southern California.

My mom and dad are both one of eight kids. Thus I have a bunch of aunts and uncles and even more cousins. I’m one of the younger kids in my generation. Many of my cousins are married and have their own families. The bisnieto (great grandchildren) generation ranges in age from newborn to mid-20s.

Growing up, I spent a lot of time with my aunts, uncles and cousins. Now that we’re adults, I still spend a lot of time with my cousins. Rather than play hide and go seek, we go out to baseball games or have game nights. I’ve never dreaded seeing my family at holidays. I don’t get that trope in holiday films. Christmas and Thanksgiving are just like other gatherings throughout the year except with a Santa Claus visit, turkey, and tamales.

After adding in my friends, friends of the family, Sean’s family, Sean’s friends (not too much overlap among friend groups due to our bicoastal relationship) the total on our guest list was well over 300. Yeah, even we were surprised by the number.

Sure, we could have gone smaller. We could have chosen a location in New York, and greatly decreased my family’s presence. We could include only mutual friends and family members we’ve both met. We could go to a courthouse with our immediate families. We don’t like any of these options.

We’re going big.

Note: Today marks 100 days until our wedding. Check out Sean’s current concern on his blog. It’s not about the guest list, but it does involve our guests.

Los Angeles

Something wicked this way runs

It’s National Running Day. Last year, I took a rest day to celebrate. This year, I planned my route so it would take me past Ray Bradbury’s home in Cheviot Hills. I didn’t know Mr. Bradbury lived so close to me until LA Observed’s post about his passing. Included of the post is a 2009 picture of Bradbury in front of the Palms-Rancho Park branch of the LA Public Library.

I’m sure I’ve passed the Bradbury home before on a run, but never had an idea that one of the best science fiction writers lived only a mile away.

I considered downloading an audiobook of the first Bradbury novel I read, Dandelion Wine, to listen to on my run. That didn’t seem right. If there’s any writer’s work I should read the old-fashioned way, it should be Ray Bradbury. Instead, I listened to a podcast of my favorite daily news show (The Madeleine Brand show). As I neared the Bradbury home, Brand and her guest, local bookstore owner David Kipen, memorialized Bradbury. They discussed Kipen’s visit to Bradbury’s home in Cheviot Hills. I found that fitting.

Rest in peace, Mr. Bradbury.

Corriendo

New Rules and streaking

In hindsight, starting a new weight lifting plan the same week I decided to join the Runner’s World summer running streak was a bad idea. Okay, it wasn’t bad, just not good.

I ran 25 miles total for May. I don’t know the last time I ran so little, but it makes sense since I took a few weeks off when I got sick, was out of town and then had that rare fainting spell.

Now that I’m running again, I can feel the effect of those weeks off and the low mileage in April (~50 miles). It’s discouraging to need a short walk break during an easy 3 mile run. While I’m not training nor have any races lined up, I don’t want to lose more of the fitness and speed I worked hard to develop in the months I was training with Marc.

Enter Runner’s World’s summer running streak. Runner’s World outlines the parameters here, but the rules are pretty simple: run at least 1 mile a day from Memorial Day through 4th of July, a 38 day streak.

I like my rest days and have never run more them 4 or 5 days consecutively. I’ve also never just gone out for a single mile. That’s easy. It probably would take me longer to get ready to run than to actually run a mile.

Starting the running streak the same week I started stage 1 of the New Rules of Lifting for Women (NROLW) program wasn’t a good idea, but it’s been manageable. Each workout leaves my legs pretty sore, so running the next day — even for 10 minutes — feels like running the day after a 20 miler or a hard half marathon. I’m glad I only have to do 1 mile a day.

WEEK OF MAY 28th
Monday: 3 miles, NROLW workout A
Tuesday: 1 mile walk, 1 mile run
Wednesday: 1 mile warm-up treadmill, NROLW workout B
Thursday: 2 miles on the track
Friday: 1 mile warm-up treadmill, NROLW workout A
Saturday: 1.3 mile run, 5 min walk
Sunday: 2.7 mile run (I wanted a whole number for my weekly total)

The runs are all generally 9:30-10 minute pace, except the track where I run closer to 9 minute miles.

As for NROLW, so far I really like the workouts. I read most of the book a few weeks ago but delayed starting the program because I was still training for the Pasadena half marathon. The only downside is that I need to get in the gym for the workouts. It’s not required as there are at-home modifications, but my dumbbells at home are too light.

It’s also nice to workout with Sean. He’s pretty familiar with the weight room and has been helpful getting me set up and correcting my form as needed. (I like that I look like I’m mid-flex rather than moving hair out of my face in the photo above.)

I should be back in the gym today, but need to give my ass some rest. Before my run yesterday I bent down to pick something up and felt a strange pain on the right side of my butt. This didn’t bother me during my easy run, but I had to put off today’s workout which calls for a couple of sets of lunges and deadlifts. I don’t think I pulled a muscle, but I know rest will help. I still plan to run a mile… because it’s only a mile.

Cultura, Los Angeles

Frida on my mind

A month ago, Sean and I checked out In Wonderland: The Surrealist Adventures of Women Artists in Mexico and the United States show at LACMA. Despite seeing the banners all over the city featuring Frida Kahlo’s “Autorretrato con Collar de Espinas” (Self Portrait with Thorn Necklace and Hummingbird), I waited until a few days before the show closed to check it out. I’m really glad I saw the show.

My older cousin, Bibi, introduced me to Frida’s art when I was in 6th grade. Thanks to Bibi, I knew about Diego Rivera’s philandering ways, the horrible bus accident and the monkeys.

I liked Frida and her art, but didn’t love it like some of my friends. I even prided myself on the fact that I wasn’t that kind of Chicana. I made a banner advertising that fact in my early blogging days. (And yes, I know there’s not one way to be a Chicana.)

Something stirred in me when I finally saw In Wonderland. Frida Kahlo was just one of about 50 artists featured. Most of her paintings were in in the section on self portraits. Despite being familiar with a couple of the paintings in the show (Las Dos Fridas, Autorretrato Con Collar de Espinas, Frida y Diego wedding portrait from 1931), I still had to stop and look at them for a bit. I stood in front of Las Dos Fridas amazed at the detail. Up close, I found new details I’d never noticed in prints, books or even a tableau vivant Halloween costume. I did the same with the wedding portrait. I’d always just thought of that one as an example of her small stature compared to el elefante, Diego Rivera. But this time I got the chance to read the text and imagine how she felt on her first wedding day.

I went through the show once and then walked back to find a crowd around Las Dos Fridas. I couldn’t blame them for stopping to stare and take it all in.

It may have taken twenty years to find my inner Frida fangirl, but she was there all along. I just needed to see the real thing to realize it.

Boda

Wedding Wednesdays: Bridesmaids and dresses

We have bridesmaids dresses!

Before I get in to that, I’d like to introduce them even though they’ve all been on the blog several times. From left to right: Nancy (cousin), Isabel (friend, ex-roommate), Lori (sister and maid of honor), Vanessa (cousin), and Valerie (cousin). Not pictured: Andrea, Sean’s best friend, because she’s in NY. If you’ve been reading a while, these women should look familiar. If the cousins look alike, that’s because they’re sisters. They come as a package.

Finding a dress was pretty easy, not that I expected it to be a huge hassle. My main worry was that I had waited too long and we’d have to put in a rush order. Fortunately, we figured it out rather quickly. .

To start off the process, I flipped through some catalogs and looked at dresses online. Initially, I didn’t find anything I really liked. And if I did like the dress, it was too expensive. I showed my cousins and sister the catalogs and pointed out a few dresses, but nothing was set in stone.

A couple weeks ago, I emailed everyone a few questions and a link to a Flickr album with 9 dresses I liked. I asked about budget, feelings about matching or wearing mismatched dresses, and which dresses they liked/disliked.

All the dresses were knee or tea length. Part of that is because shorter dresses will probably be cooler in late summer LA, but the main reason is a bit bridezilla. Simply put, I’m already short compared to my cousins and Isa and I’m convinced that they’ll look even taller in long gowns.

After the initial email I learned that everyone was on board with my choices and had chosen a clear front-runner, they were fine with the budget I had in mind, and we really needed to try on some dresses. Lori said it best, “I’m kind of indifferent on the dresses, because I don’t know how I like a dress until it’s on me. Soooo lets start shopping!”

On Saturday morning, we met up at the Alfred Angelo store in West Covina, a midpoint between LA, Ontario, and Hacienda Heights. Tía Martha came along with the cousins. My mom opted out since she wasn’t keen on their mother of the bride selection.

We picked out four dresses to start and the saleswoman set up a few dressing rooms. Since we had five women trying on dresses, the process was rather quick. In less than an hour, we decided that we didn’t like the original front-runner and chose a new favorite with an added belt. Everyone tried on the dress and liked the fit. I texted Andrea in NY photos and details. She was on board with the others. We went forward with the order and got details on how Andrea could put in an order from across the country.

And I checked another item off the to-do list.